Editors Humour.
An aching back sent Frank stumbling to the chemist for relief. After a search, he found what he was looking for: a selection of heating pads specifically for people with back pain—all on the bottom shelf.
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A friend was puzzled by the odd messages left on his answering machine. Day after day friends and family would talk and then say, "Beep." He discovered the reason for the joke when he decided to listen to his greeting. "Hi," it said. "I'm not in right now, so please leave a beep after the message."
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John determined to see the world and signed on a Norwegian freighter as a deckhand. He was being trained as helmsmen, and John's first lesson was given by the mate, a seasoned but gentle white-haired seafarer. John was holding the heading he had been given, when the mate ordered, "Come starboard." Pleased at knowing immediately which way the starboard was, John left the helm and walked over to his instructor. The mate had an incredulous look on his face as the helm swung freely, but he merely asked politely, "Could you bring the ship with you?"
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While rummaging through her attic, Kathryn found an old shotgun. Unsure about how to dispose of it, she called her parents.
"Take it to the police station," her mother suggested.
Kathryn was about to hang up when her mother added, "And Kathryn?"
"Yes, Mom?"
"Call first."
