Editors Humour.
Michelle's sister Darlene has the courage—but not always the skills—to tackle any home-repair project. For example, in her garage are pieces of a lawn mower she once tried to fix. So she wasn't surprised the day her other sister, Jesse, and Michelle found Darlene attacking her vacuum cleaner with a screwdriver.
"I can't get this thing to cooperate," she explained.
"Why don't you drag it out to the garage and show it the lawn mower?" Jesse suggested.
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Donella couldn't decide whether to go to Rotorua or Hamilton for vacation, so she called the airlines to get prices.
"Airfare to Rotorua is $450," the cheery salesperson replied.
"And what about Hamilton?"
"We have a really great rate to Hamilton —$99," she said "But there is a stopover."
"Where?"
"In Rotorua," she said.
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Dick had spent the late winter months waiting impatiently for signs of spring. When the first warm, sunny Saturday arrived, he eagerly unlocked the back door and stepped onto the patio deck. He was pleased by the sight of green sprouts and the sounds of singing birds. More than anything else, he delighted in the sweet aroma of the spring air.
Knocking on the kitchen window, he beckoned to his wife to join him in enjoying the pleasures of the season.
She quietly brought him back to earth when she reminded him that he was standing under the dryer vent, inhaling the scent of fabric softener.
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One spring day Patricia was taking the roll in her secretarial class at the local Polytech. One of the sun worshipers was absent.
"Cindy won't be here this afternoon?" Patricia asked.
"She went home to lay in the sun," a young woman in the front row answered.
Trying to correct her grammar without embarrassing her before the class, I whispered, "Lie."
Okay," she replied in astonishment. "Cindy got sick and went home."