Editors Humour.
Mathew & his wife run a small restaurant where they often name their specials after their employees—dishes like "Chicken Mickey," after their dishwasher who gave them the recipe, and "Rod's Ribs," after a waiter who had his personal style of barbecue. One evening after rereading the menu, Mathew broke with this tradition and changed the description of the special they had named after their chef. Despite her skills and excellent reputation, somehow he didn't think an entrée named "Salmon Ella" would go over big with their customers.
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The customer ordering a floral arrangement from Margie's shop was giving her very specific guidelines.
"Nothing fragrant," she instructed. "Nothing too tall or too wild. And no bright colours, please. My house is decorated in beige and cream. Here is a wallpaper sample."
She handed Margie a plain square of tan-coloured paper.
"Your name?" Margie asked.
"Mrs Bland," the woman replied.
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When a fellow piano tuner was ill, Pat took over his assignment of tuning a piano in a girls' boardinghouse. While he was at work, several of the girls strolled casually through the room in various states of undress. The climax came when a young lady in skimpy loungewear appeared to pay the bill. As he was writing the receipt, she suddenly gave him a bewildered look, then fled, screaming, "That's not our regular man!"
Their regular man is blind.
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Daniel, a flight attendant, split the back of his pants one day during a flight. To save embarrassment, he decided to work in front of the beverage cart, facing forward. The arrangement worked perfectly until he got to the last row and a passenger leaned over to him and said in a low voice, "Your fly is open."